


Crotch Snakes

by TriadicUniverse



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alien Sex, M/M, Tentabulges
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-19
Updated: 2015-05-19
Packaged: 2018-03-31 08:07:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3970369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TriadicUniverse/pseuds/TriadicUniverse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"How about Dave/Sollux first time, learning about each other’s different anatomy n’ shit. Imo that’s one of the cutest things ever. OR you could do Sollux/Karkat with Sollux putting Karkat’s loud mouth to a better use ;D "</p><p>I'm still taking requests at triadicuniverse.tumblr.com</p>
            </blockquote>





	Crotch Snakes

“It’s moving.”

Ironically, those words made Sollux stop moving, a fact that he was not pleased about.  This was because each movement had rubbed his crotch right up against the strangely hard lump in Strider’s pants, and the sensation was enough to make the human’s inane babbling somewhat tolerable.  But there was something about that particular comment that caused Sollux to stop where he was, his ass parked on Dave’s thighs.

“What’s moving?” he said, his voice a rasping snarl.

The human’s face was bright red, rendering his poker face pretty much useless.  It was difficult to remain stoic when one was flat on his back with a horny alien straddling his clothed boner, but that wouldn’t keep Dave from trying.  At least for now he was able to keep his voice even.

“I was referring to the dancing snake that’s apparently taken up residence in your pants,” Dave said.  Sollux’s eyebrows furrowed as he struggled to extract meaning from that sentence.  It didn’t help when Dave continued to speak.  “I mean, the little guy’s clearly having a great time, but I don’t have a fuckin’ clue what he’s doing in there.  Did you stick a snake down your pants on purpose?  Was he hibernating in your ass for the winter?  Do all trolls hide reptiles in their pants to defend their crotch from predators?”

Sollux swiftly gave up trying to make sense of the crotch snake talk, and instead began to move his hips again before his bulges decided to crawl back into his sheathe.  He dragged his groin against Dave’s, earning a breathy groan from both of them.  Much to his delight, the human began to reach in between his legs.  Sollux let his eyes drift shut.

“Hey little guy,” Dave said.  Sollux’s eyes snapped open.  “Wanna come out of there?  I gotta borrow Sollux’s dick for a second.  I’ll give him back, don’t worry.”

God damn it.  He slapped Dave’s hand away.  His bulges didn’t know whether to shrivel up and fall off or squirm out of his pants.  It looked like he’d have to move things along before Dave decided to open his mouth again.

“Take off your pants,” he snapped, scooting over so that he could do the same.  Dave raised a hand to his forehead in a salute before he obeyed.

Since Sollux’s garments were not three sizes too small, he was soon naked from the waist down.  Something about this made Dave pause, his jeans halfway down his thighs and his underwear straining against–something.  Sollux lifted a hand and was about to investigate before an obnoxiously familiar voice stopped him.

“Those aren’t snakes,” Dave said.  He seemed to be having a difficult time saying that with a straight face.

“No, they’re not,” Sollux said icily.  “And that sure as fuck isn’t a bulge.”

“Sure? I mean it is bulgi–oh, fuck, hello.”

His words became a gasp as Sollux grabbed him, this time without interruption.  He wasn’t sure how he felt about fondling something that was so undeniably alien, but the sounds that came out of Dave’s mouth were worlds better than hearing him talk.  Even better was how Strider, not about to be outdone, reached out to grab him by the base.

It was Sollux’s turn to groan.  His bulges curled around Dave’s wrist, and his nook clenched over the fingertips that brushed against it.

“So…”  Dave pressed his thumb on the junction where the two tendrils met, and the troll above him shivered.  Whatever he was about to say seemed to slip away before he could say it, but that didn’t matter; there were far more important things to worry about.

After several minutes of awkward fumbling at too-hot hands pawing and alien genitals, Sollux brushed the entrance of his nook over the tip of Dave’s too-hard bulge.  This would work.  Totally.  He needed something in him, after all, and this was the best option for the moment.  

Dave opened his mouth and actually said, “I’ve seen enough hentai to know where this is going.”

Sollux narrowed his eyes, then pressed his hands down over the human’s mouth.  He sat down on Dave’s bulge and cringed when it didn’t move at all, but was far too pissed to even think of slowing down.  He did not release Strider’s mouth as he rocked up and down, fucking himself on the alien sex thing.

“Shut up, shut up shut up,” he said in time with the movement of his hips.  Dave did not shut up, but the muffled groans behind his hands were far preferable to words.  Sollux took the opportunity to enjoy the utter lack of bullshit spilling from his partner’s lips as well as the thick heat inside of him that was definitely starting to grow on him. 

As he tipped his head back and opened his mouth, enjoying the heat and pressure coiling in his stomach, Dave began to thrash.  Without warning, Sollux felt something hot and wet fill him, and he let out an embarrassing squeal.

After the moment had passed, Strider collapsed back onto the platform, whining as Sollux continued to move, but the troll was not about to stop until he got the orgasm that he had deserved, damnit.  He doubled over, his forehead pressed against Dave’s chest as he rocked his hips, but it wasn’t enough. He cursed rudely, becoming increasingly loud and offensive, until warm hands wrapped around his bulges.

“God,” he heard Dave breathe, and he came with a final growl.  His nook clenched hard, and gold painted both of them.  He didn’t move, because fuck that noise.  

Dave patted his head, and then fucking laughed, and Sollux hissed.  A hand squeezed his bulges, and he whined.

“Hey little guy,” Dave whispered.  Sollux drew his hand back and punched him right in the face.


End file.
